Sunday, March 22, 2015

The Ballad of the Spoiled Traveler who Grovels for Gold Status



I learned something interesting the past two weeks: I am a spoiled flyer, and incredibly so given I haven’t really experienced anything. I act like I have flown 100,000+ miles a year, perennially 1K status with United (a weird dream of mine), but I haven’t. I act entitled when flying, but that’s being entitled in coach, which isn’t the best look to show. I think this started during my RTW trip, when I took 30 flights in the course of the 105 day trip. I took flights on 10 airlines, 8 different types of planes. I had flights that were forty-five minutes on prop-planes (Ho Chi Minh to Da Lat), and flights 15-hours long (New York to Johannesburg). I think it only grew worse when I was staffed on a project in Battle Creek, Mississippi, where I flew twice a week for three months. I flew enough to gain Gold status on United (which will expire this year, unless I get another project where I have to fly), but to also gain a real perspective of the terrible-ness of flying domestically in the US on regional airlines. I know think of myself of a seasoned traveler, a brilliant user of mileage programs and cards and deals. I’m so far from really being that, though.

Then again, I am good. I have continually maintained a balance of at least 75,000 miles on either American or United. I cancel my cards to reset the timer to get the offer again. I am never happy with the offers given and always look for the best deal. I scour Million Miles blog like it was the bible (it is, for mileage hoarders). But all of this would be more meaningful if I was still travelling weekly, if it was pounding out 200,000 mile years like so many other Americans. I am in that weird position of caring enough to want to be that, and smart enough to compile enough miles to act like I have that status, but not actually be that.

It hit me when I recently booked a mileage ticket for a family trip to India this Christmas season. I’m not going with the same dates as my family. My parents are utilizing United’s excellent mileage program allowance of a free stopover to go to Vietnam and Cambodia. I am doing the same to go back to South Africa, go back to Cape Town and see if it is just as good the second time around. But why am I upset? I am because I am being forced to take Egypt Airlines to fly back from Johannesburg to New York. There is a direct flight, but very limited award travel availability on that flight, given its proximity to New Years (Jan 9th). I want that flight, I want to avoid flying Egpyt Airlines, an airline that doesn’t serve alcohol, and might not even have AVOD (Video On-Demand) on their long-haul flights. Who wants that?

Last time I did a major mileage ticket on United was during my RTW trip. I got all the flights I wanted. I got flights on Thai Airways, and Singapore Airlines (which are basically impossible to get these days on United tickets). I got a flight on All Nippon, and I got a direct New York to Johannesburg, despite booking that just 5 weeks before departure. I got it all, and that’s why I’m spoiled. My first real interaction with utilizing mileage tickets was perfect. It will never get as good. I’m due for years of Egypt Airlines.

The only way to avoid this is be a gold , or platinum, or 1K (or Global Services, though those are the Gods of aviation travel, getting that status with a personalized invite – I shit you not). Those guys get more mileage availability, they get more lee-way. They get dedicated lines on United with people who can understand basic questions, know where Ho Chi Minh City is, and actually book things for you. That’s where I want to be in my life as a traveler. Honestly, if I could get paid to fly annoying routes like Newark-Grand Rapids all day, I would. I would fly, I would be an air travel reviewer today if I could. It is my true dream job, get paid to fly and get paid to rack up miles. My mom’s cousin is an executive at a mid-level pharma company, and he is the President of Emergng Markets, and he gets to fly abut 300,000 miles a year on United, and gets all the perks that comes with it. Sure, I would envy his salary, but I envy his mileage status more.

I’ve been given an incredible opportunity by my Dad to travel a lot. I recently signed up for FlightDIary.net, a site that lets you log all your flights you’ve taken. Below are the results

 

Those are the results. Given that I’ve only traveled for work from Newark to Grand Rapids (or Detroit), that’s mightily impressive for someone who’s not even 24. I’ve taken a whole lot of flights, but I want to take more. Let’s just say this, people who use this site generally have taken more flights than me. I am lucky that I have such an expansive flight history ex-US, a credit to a father who instilled in me and my sister a love of travel, and a me who likes to go to India (the airport I’ve flown in and out of the most is Newark, in 2nd place is Mumbai). I’ve taken 180 flights (dating back to 1999 – I’ve taken probably 20-25 before that), but most people on the site have taken 250+. Most are people who are 1K on United, or at least Platinum, who live in airports, who have those dedicated lines I want so much.

It is a weird feeling, being trapped in a love and an interest in something you won’t attain. My interest in flying is such of a person who has a 1K status on United. My actual status is not that, though. I love flying, and I can give a good dissertation on the relative quality of most airlines, but that is from a coach perspective. One of the great pieces of knowledge about award travel is that it is the most efficient and cost-effective way to fly on Business/First class. Of course, to do that you have to have 160,000 miles. I want to get there, but I never will.

To be honest, I have no idea what this post is about. It may make no sense, but it makes sense to me. It makes sense to a person who has thought about ‘moving’ to Houston to live with my Aunt so I have to fly to New Jersey each week (yes, I considered that, and yes, my cousin who lives in Houston and is as obsessed as I am thought it was a good idea). It makes sense to a person who checks United.com everyday to see if they open up tickets from Johannesburg to New Jersey on January 9th, 2016, just so I don’t have to take Egyptair. It makes sense to that guy, the guy who hopes his FlightDIary.net page has more than half his flights domestic (meaning I fly for work – a lot), and who can compete with the 1K’s of the world who know America’s airport network like the back of their hand.

In the end, I blame my Dad, for making us fly to all these amazing places, and get my love of flying started early. I blame my job, and my initial project in Battle Creek, for allowing me the opportunity to fly a lot for just long enough to get Gold Status, something that provides few real benefits but something I don’t want to lose. I also blame my own interest in aviation, my sick hope that someone who works at JFK will read this and no my dream job of flying each long-haul flight from JFK in a year to rate all of their airlines and air-routes (for money, of course). That is my true dream job, a dream that can become a reality if I get the right project, the right client and right mindset. I won’t stop until I get that 1K status. It will happen one day, and when it does, I sure as hell won’t be taking Egypt Airlines home from Johannesburg to New York.

About Me

I am a man who will go by the moniker dmstorm22, or StormyD, but not really StormyD. I'll talk about sports, mainly football, sometimes TV, sometimes other random things, sometimes even bring out some lists (a lot, lot, lot of lists). Enjoy.